This was initially an Instagram caption, then I realised not everyone is on insta and may need to see this message today! Today I woke up in such a foul mood, which is unlike me, so I prayed and asked God to see me through! I got up and got on with my morning routine, but I felt like the devil was just attacking me from all directions. I kept feeling so down, unworthy, feeling like a failure, feeling like I was expecting too much from people! I felt so lost, and I couldn’t even pin point what was actually wrong with me! I get amazing messsges from you guys DAILY! God knows I appreciate the comments they keep me going, but what does that do if I don’t believe in MYSELF? Always want to keep it 💯with you all, I have really down days trust me, BUT, one thing that constantly keeps me going is the fact that God gave me a task as a mother to be the best I can be! He also blessed with the skill of writing, so no matter how many people read my blogs, I WILL still keep going. I’m made perfectly in God’s vision 🏆 I’m such a great mother and friend! I’m great at what I do, and although I’m not there yet, I pray Gods plan will see me through! So if you are ever feeling down, it’s okay to not be okay all the time, but just ask God for guidance to get up and believe in yourself! – thank you to my best friend Tinu (founder of Mums and Tea) for the realist pep talk that I needed today! ❤️❤️❤️ Isaiah 43:4-5 🙏🏾
Currently I’m binge watching on Dead To Me, while JR has a nap and the weather is so lovely outside! We’ve had our one hour exercise so now we are indoors for the rest of the day!
The life of Quarantine! Nothing could have ever prepared us for this lockdown literally! I remember two days before the lockdown commenced, hubby and I were super excited as we had a date night planned. I had also just met my new managers, as God had blessed me with a new job. Then… POW! Boris Johnson announces a national lockdown, and we are told to stay in our homes, restaurants were closed, gyms closed, all non-essential stores were closed, people started working from home!
Woah! Just like that everything shut down. I was basically jobless, I stopped taking JR to nursery and hubby was told to stay home and only go to work based on a rota. It just felt like an episode of Black Mirror, it was all too weird!
But here we are, on a sunny bank holiday weekend…. at home! But I try not to complain, because as I mentioned in my previous posts (if you’ve not read them go back and read guyssssss), it’s a time to be very grateful and continue to have faith in any situation God puts us in.
I’ve learnt how to be more creative with JR! We’ve enjoyed more arts and crafts, reading, learning, role play, and I’ve just been getting to know him MORE! Like understand what an amazing smart little boy he is becoming and just learning more about myself! I’ve learnt how resilient I can be, I’ve also learnt that I don’t like to ask for help and think I can do anything, I know I’m a super mama but it’s actually ok to not always be ok and just need some time out!
I’ve noticed since I’ve starting planning mine and JR’s week ahead, it helps keep me accountable. I know what activities I’m going to do with him, it also helps keep me on top of all my tasks and it ensures that I workout at some point everyday. I also make sure I ALWAYS start my day by speaking to God, reading my bible app (hubby and I usually read bible plans together then discuss), and I also like to read my Joyce Meyer Devotional, she always helps me kickstart my day. Somehow, each message she delivers resonates with me.
Two AMAZING books by my favourite author and pastor – Joyce Meyer.
I think finding your best coping mechanisms can help if you ever feel down during this time. It’s normal, we are all human, and we are currently facing something we have never experienced before. I enjoy reading my bible to find verses that I can pray on, I also enjoy binge watching my favourite series on Netflix, or going for a solo walk to just clear my head.
Today is the day we find out what Boris will decide to do after 7 weeks in lockdown. I will be honest, I’m anxious, I think I really dislike not knowing what is happening. However, I then remind myself that God says we should not worry about the future, no matter how much we worry it’s not going to change anything.
For now I’m enjoying just being still, spending quality time with my son, and just learning how to deal with situations in a life a bit better.
Quite a lengthy read, got quite carried away writing so thank you for sticking with me! Next okay I think I will document some of the activities that I do with JR. Till then stay safe lovelies x
Wow it’s been 7 weeks now that we’ve been in Quarantine, and honestly it’s has it’s ups and downs!
It’s has been a blessing in disguise, I’ve spent so much time with my son, creating memories, learning new things, spending more time with God and just coming to peace with myself!
Time has slowed right down, so I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching and understanding the reasons behind some of my emotions of recent. With the aid of my amazing Joyce Meyer books, Online devotionals, my bible app and just some alone time I’ve realised I was lacking ALOT of self love.
I was very dependent of others telling me how good I was rather than realising it myself, I was very dependent on my partner and I didn’t really like being alone. This time out has made me understand why I had been feeling that way, and through acceptance and understanding I’m on the road to being the best version of ME!
I’m a mother, and I’m an amazing mother at that. My son is super happy, confident, intelligent and it’s most definitely part of the environment he has been bought up in, and just all the learning and attention I give to him. While trying to be the best mother, I’m also trying to be the best partner, while also trying to be the best version of MYSELF! How? I think I need to do a 101 Blog on that one.
Each day is a struggle as I figure out how to keep lil one entertained and active, I suppose creating a routine every Sunday night for the week has particularly helped keep us organised. It also helps me make sure that he’s doing enough learning and lots of play. As the weather also gets nicer we’ve been going on more walks and enjoying the outside too. Spending more time with daddy too now that’s he’s home!
But for now, despite the circumstance of this lockdown, I’m grateful. I’m grateful for time, good health, happiness and my amazing family!
Last night I was having one of my many daily chats with my mother, and she said “Why don’t you blog anymore?”, as usual I made up and excuse and said “it’s because I’m working on something else right now”. She then reminded me of my God given skills and said I should not be wasting it!
Immediately I realised I can actually still be writing while working on the many things I’m working on. Writing is something I actually really enjoy doing, so why am I not making the most of my skills?
Something I’m finding difficult is keeping consistent with my blog! Why? I really cannot answer! Maybe because I think after all the writing and pouring my heart out, what if nobody even reads it? Well then I need to ask myself the purpose of my blog? Is it for me? Or for everyone else? To be honest, it’s a bit of both, I want to write because I really enjoy it and it’s like a sense of escapism for me, but I also really really enjoy inspiring people! It gives me so much joy! So the more people the read the more it makes me happy!!
With that being said, while we are all in this lockdown I will TRY my very hardest to keep you guys involved with what I’m up too, how I’m managing to keep Jeremiah entertained, how we are doing with home schooling and just everything Gabz I suppose!
Thank you so much for sticking with me, sorry for the inconsistency!!
Hope you are all keeping well and safe during this lockdown.
Gabriellelouisediaries 